That Time I Fell & Smashed My Face in Desolation Canyon

On my second day in Death Valley, I tripped over my own feet, landed on my face and left a puddle of blood in Desolation Canyon.
Really, I’m a little surprised it took me so long to hurt myself while alone in the wilderness. I am clumsy. I trip often and without reason. Sometimes my ankles roll out from under me, just for fun, as if they have better things to do than keep me upright. I am forever knocking into things, dinging myself lightly on furniture, cabinetry, sun shades and dog paws. I stab myself in the eye with a mascara wand as least once a week, never mind that I’ve been wearing mascara daily for more than 20 years.